Brisbane spends millions of dollars on tourism campaigns, promotional material and flashy ads, but it turns out a Victorian country town is more famous than us.
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It's outrageous. It's an injustice. It's unAustralian.
It's surely enough to get even famously mild-mannered Lord Mayor Graham Quirk worked up.
On Wednesday's edition of Family Feud, the Channel Ten game show dedicated to wordplay-based clan warfare, two contestants were asked to name an Australian city beginning with B.
"Brisbane," suggested Sydney-based Sam Lage, which was of course, the appropriate answer.
Now the competition works by allocating points based on where contestant's reply fits into a survey of answers from the public.
So imagine the confusion when "Brisbane" – as we've said, the only realistic response – scored just 11 points.
The audience's puzzlement was replaced with laughter when Sam's sister-in-law Sandra took her turn.
"Berlin?"
Let's give Sandra the benefit of the doubt and accept she really didn't hear host Grant Denyer ask for an Australian city.
But what was the Australian city beginning with B that came up trumps in the survey?
"The top answer we were looking for was Bendigo," said Denyer.
Bendigo?
Really?
You could even hear the audience thinking "What the...?" as Sandra replied "Oh, OK, yep."
I'm sorry, this is not OK. In which reality is Bendigo better known to Australians than Brisbane?
This is not an attack on Bendigo itself. Bendigo is a fine town, with a rich history of gold mining and splendid architecture. It even has its own bank.
Bendigo is certainly worthy of being a common response to the question "Name an Australian capital starting with B, alongside Ballarat, Bathurst, Burnie, Bunbury or Bundaberg".
But the most common? That dog won't hunt, monsignor.
Brisbane already suffered the indignity of being called "Birsbane" during last year's One Direction concert (not to mention the indignity of hosting a One Direction concert).
We cannot allow ourselves to be dissed by participants in a game show survey.
A probing inquiry into Family Feud's survey methodology yielded only the following response from Network Ten.
"Family Feud reaches out to audiences all over the country to complete our national surveys including our loyal Brisbane viewers," according to a spokesperson.
Surely they're not accusing Brisbane survey respondents of not knowing which city they live in?
That would be grounds for vengeful legal action.
Perhaps a better explanation would be that this particular survey was only carried out in Victoria? If that was the case, we can sit back and tut-tut about "typical Mexicans".
Of course, it could be the education system at fault. Perhaps geography needs to be NAPLAN tested.
Either way, it would seem those flashy tourism campaigns promoting Brisbane will be needed until the most common answer to every Family Feud survey question is Brisbane.
Or maybe we would be better off just changing our fair city's name to Berlin.
