There are sprays. And then there are the type of tirades which strip paint from walls and scatter even the filthiest rats.The following list celebrates the second variety, edging out the battle between the Hughes and Mortimer clans; the war of words between Warren Ryan and Roy Masters/Phil Gould; Brian Smith's battle with Wayne Bennett and Denis Fitzgerald's bitter split with fellow Eels greats Ray Price, Peter Sterling and Brett Kenny.
Subscribe now for unlimited access.
$0/
(min cost $0)
or signup to continue reading
If you're looking to get riled up for Rivalry Round, don the flak jacket, prepare the antivenom and enjoy the 10 greatest sprays of all time …
10 GUS v STICKY
Phil Gould fell out with Ricky Stuart after their relationship at the Roosters went sour. The pair have since made up, but not before Gus penned this in his Sun-Herald column in April 2009: ''Even if I were motivated to coach, you'd be the last person I'd help. To be honest Ricky, you are the most pig-headed and ungrateful person I've met in football. I discontinued my association with you four years ago because I could no longer tolerate your petulance.''
9 JT v HAGES
Jason Taylor and Michael Hagan, the coaches of South Sydney and Parramatta respectively, got in each other's faces on the way to a post-match press conference in July 2007. Taylor took exception after his team were denied permission to warm up on the field directly behind the southern end of Parramatta Stadium.
Hagan: Why don't you work on catching the ball instead of wrestling all f---ing game?
Taylor: We won without Joey [Andrew Johns] … How f---ed are you? You're living off what Brian Smith built here while he's up in Newcastle trying to rebuild what you f---ed up.
8. HINDY v MENACE
Nathan Hindmarsh is an unflappable character. Until, that is, he ran 10 metres to plant one on serial sledger Michael Ennis in April.
''He's just a grub,'' Hindmarsh said afterwards. ''I've been niggled by better.''
7. STICKY v IRVINE
Ricky Stuart and Cronulla did not split amicably. Stuart didn't name him, but take it as given that this spray, delivered in The Sun-Herald in February, in the wake of the Kade Snowden debacle, was delivered at Sharks chairman Damian Irvine.
''If you've got monkeys running the zoo, it's always going to be a mess. I chuckled to myself when I heard people talking about loyalty during the week, when people at the club fail to honour it themselves.''
6. BRETT STEWART v NRL
The NRL imposed a four-match ban on Brett Stewart and a $100,000 fine on Manly following the infamous 2009 season launch. Stewart was subsequently cleared in court of a sexual assault charge stemming from that night. More than two years have passed, but the enmity has not subsided. Sea Eagles coach Des Hasler delivered this gem in May: ''While Brett has been vindicated at court level, in Brett's mind and in his backyard, for want of being theatrical, his soul hasn't been cleansed because the game hasn't apologised to him.''
5. SOUTHS v ROOSTERS
This is a rivalry more than 100 years in the making, the brainchild of Russell Crowe. The actor commissioned the Book of Feuds to chronicle South Sydney's altercations with rivals. The most bitter, of course, is with the Roosters.
''The Roosters lost their soul … It seems there's nothing they do that isn't in some way aimed at us, or at imitating us … Yet, try as they might, there's no escaping the cold hard facts that South Sydney were formed before Eastern Suburbs, have won far more premierships than Easts, Sydney City and Sydney Roosters combined, and have a much greater junior and fan base.''
4. MASON v FOLKES
Willie Mason and Steve Folkes won a premiership together at the Bulldogs. Big Willie believes the club should have won more - three more to be exact. In response to Folkes' assertion that the ''family club'' was better off without him, Mason penned the following in his Sun-Herald column in November 2007:
''The one thing that I've got that he'll never have is the support of the players … He is a poor coach. I never learnt anything from him in 10 years … We should have won four comps in that time, not one … I'm sorry I wasn't one of Folksey's clones. He just wants little monkeys to coach, but I'm a bit out of the box.''
3. MUNDINE v EVERYONE
Anthony Mundine has delivered plenty of sledges over the years; Laurie Daley was ''running on old legs" and he described Melbourne as unworthy premiers in 1999. Just days after the barb, the Storm won the rematch 70-10. But the most gobsmacking gaffe was his take on the September 11 terrorist attacks:
''They call [September 11] an act of terrorism but if you can understand religion and our way of life, it's not about terrorism. It's about fighting for God's laws, and America's brought it upon themselves [for] what they've done in the history of time.''
2. BOZO v HOLLYWOOD
An Immortal delivers a line that will last forever. It's 1987, then-Manly coach Bob Fulton approaches whistleblower Bill Harrigan, in the tunnel of Shark Park, and delivers this sledge in response to a perceived unfair penalty count:
''I hope you get run over by a truck. I hope it's a cement truck.''
1. MAL v FILTHY NSW RATS
The genius in this spray is that it spares no one, yet the shamed aren't named. Mal Meninga's ''faceless men of influence'' are believed to include Ricky Stuart, Bob Fulton, the NRL judiciary and the Sydney press: ''It was a victory against the very rats and filth that tried to poison a monumental team with lies, personal attacks, arrogance and disrespect … I know the people who were behind it. I know their personal agendas … They are the rats who, rather than celebrating a remarkable football team, tried to drown it with a flood of lies, half-truths and propaganda.''
